19centconstable: (I detect wine.)
Constable George Crabtree ([personal profile] 19centconstable) wrote2011-10-18 09:26 pm

Case # 27: Video

[George is sitting at the table in his room. His helmet is in front of him, and he's scrubbing furiously at the badge mounted on it with a toothbrush. He pauses and peers at the badge through a magnifying glass.]

Oh, for the love of...

[Back to scrubbing. There are still small traces of tarnish. George eventually puts the toothbrush down with a frustrated sigh, and tells the viewers at home:]

I suppose I ought to be thankful at least that it hasn't grown a tree.

[Oh, did you think this was an accidental post? No, George's communicator has yet to act up, he was just distracted by the creeping rust.]

I had just wanted to say that the other day I happened to notice a suspicious damp bit on the floor of the fifth level common room, by the shark's tank, and I thought someone ought to check into that.

[Just in case, as George suspects, the shark has started piddling on the floor to get attention. Or, more realistically, the decay has made its way down to level five and has started eroding the tank. And nobody likes a loose shark. Particularly the shark, because they can't breathe air very well.]

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:25 am (UTC)(link)
Don't say that. It might.

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 04:19 pm (UTC)(link)
That would be impossible to wear.

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 04:53 pm (UTC)(link)
A lot of things are impossible but they still happen.

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 04:55 pm (UTC)(link)
But what would its roots even live on?!?

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 04:57 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't know. It would be interesting to find out.

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 04:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Only if it were on someone else's head.

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 05:33 pm (UTC)(link)
That's not nice to say. I'm sure no one else would want it there.

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 06:17 pm (UTC)(link)
But I don't want one there either.

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:03 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't think anyone does.

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:12 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't think most people here have got badges, in any case.

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Or we might just have a lot more trees around.

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:25 pm (UTC)(link)
You haven't...grown or experienced anything today, have you?

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Just the rusting. But some people seem to be unexperiencing unexpected death toll.

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:35 pm (UTC)(link)
I haven't either, thank goodness.

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:36 pm (UTC)(link)
So it's just trees for you.

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:39 pm (UTC)(link)
The threat of trees.

I never thought I'd say that.

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Trees are a threat where I'm from.

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Some trees eat people. In a way.

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:49 pm (UTC)(link)
They digest them! But only if you get too close. They'll pick you up with their branches.

[identity profile] 19centconstable.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:51 pm (UTC)(link)
But. Trees haven't got...mouths...

[identity profile] thebestnose.livejournal.com 2011-10-19 10:52 pm (UTC)(link)
These do. They have bulbs that their food goes in.